My are so sweet, so tiny, so loved.

My precious, brand new son. I hold you in my arms...against my breast...and kiss your tiny cheek.

My child sent from heaven...I've waited, dreamed, hoped and prayed for you for so long and now you lay asleep in my arms as I admire your I ponder the reality that you are my son and I am your mommy...
as I dream my dreams for you and cherish this moment in time.

My God, why did I have to be awakened from this dream...this blissful reality only to be shattered into a million pieces and broken in my heart and spirit.

My God, why does your child sent from Heaven so innocent and new have to suffer with something so unfair, so undeserving. Why must he have this disability? Why was he chosen...and what will it mean?

My God, you heal my child this minute I pray and take away this awful news
we received.

My will be just fine. God will heal you. You are loved so very much and you will be healed. I trust that He is watching over you and will always keep you in His care for surely He wouldn't allow a precious child to suffer in any way.

My God, what does this mean for my child? There are no answers! Not one doctor can tell me what to expect...not one solid answer and all we have are tests and tests and tests and waiting to hear what each test means and worry, wonder, fear, anxiety, questions. There are so many questions and no answers. God, there are no answers! How can I think straight and feel peace without any answers? I will believe that my precious child will be healed and none of this awful news will touch his precious little being.

My child, your mommy is a mess. I watch you grow and smile and laugh and giggle and struggle. I watch you struggle with so many things that should come normally to children and yet they are so hard for you and you try so hard. You are so wonderful my child and I am missing out on cherishing the way you learn and the things you accomplish for I am expecting something of you that you aren't ready for yet. Forgive me my child, forgive me God.

God in heaven I pray that you will help me because I am lost. I don't know what to do...what to to deal with this. I am totally helpless. Please give me wisdom...

Thank you God for allowing me to see that I am to be thankful for each and every little, tiny accomplishment that my child makes. Thank you God and I will cherish every small and wonderful accomplishment as it is so very much and so very wonderful too!

Thank you God for answering my prayer. Thank you for healing me and allowing me to see my precious child in a brand new way!

My precious little boy who I love so very much...I am your mommy and you are my son and you are the most beautiful boy in this world just because you are you! You be who you are and be proud of yourself for you are special
in every way.

My sweet, little boy...we'll be just fine. I'll hold your hand and take you one step at a time and cherish you for who you are and each step you take. My child, I will walk with you at your own pace and allow you to be You...just as I am Me. My precious child, your mommy is learning just as you are...and together
we will learn...each in our own special way.

I love you my sweet, precious angel.

Written by SLD on 6-15-98 ©


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